time for a haircut

You know it's time to get new friends when the mere mention of their names at the airport gets you dragged off to the little room where you have to take off your shoes, watch and belt before getting a thorough frisking and a once-over with the metal detecting wand:
overly friendly security officer: And who did you stay with while you were in Israel?
me, because I'm an idiot: My friend Payam.
OFSO: Payam what?
me, realizing what I had done and contemplating for a moment just saying "smith": Etminani
OFSO: ...
me: he's canadian, from montreal.
OFSO: please come with me.

And you know its time for a haircut when, once you get to that little room, the first part of you that the super-smily security guy checks with his little hand is your head.