So.
Well, I was sick for a while. And then I was better. And then I was sick again. And now I'm better.
Anyone out there seeing a pattern here? Anyone guess what I'm going to be in a few days? Points for the people in the back that said "not your tip-toppingist".
And just because I'm insured here in Israel (and who says my non-paying job has no perks?) I went to the doctor. After explaining my gross symptoms that I will not be sharing at the moment, out of respect for people and their lunches, the doctor took my temperature, checked my vitals and had me pee in a cup. Then he sent me on to another doctor who also took my temperature, checked my vitals and asked me to pee in a cup (both the first and second doctors spoke delightful english. I was glad). The second doctor also ordered me a round of additional temperature and cup-peeing tests at the clinic up the road. So I wandered on down the street, trying desperately to fill my bladder so I could pee some more.
When I got to the not-so-english-speaking clinic the nice not-so-english-speaking lady at the desk handed me a little sterile cup and said: "You. Pee-pee. Here." Along with my little cup, they handed me a little sterile towelette ("for clean." clean what I wasn't entirely sure, but I made good use of it.) and a little bag with the word BIOHAZARD written across the front in GIANT yellow letters. Trust me, it's not easy to make friends in an Israeli medical clinic when you're carrying around a bag that screams out BIOHAZARD to passers-by. People got out of my way. fast.
So I took my sterile little cup and my sterile little towelette and my (presumably) sterile BIOHAZARD baggie into the horribly filthy bathroom that not only contained a jillion normal bathroom germs, but no doubt contained all sorts of freaky health clinic germs like the bubonic plague. And the last known case of smallpox.

And here's a side note about Israeli bathrooms: See, in North America, if someone built a bathroom and upon finishing the bathroom they noticed that the door didn't actually open all the way because the toilet was in the way, they would tear it all apart and rebuild it. In Israel (and most other places I've been for that matter) they would simply cut a giant hole in the door. Problem solved.

And so, I took my little pee-filled cup in my little BIOHAZARD baggie back to the nice not-so-english-speaking lady at the desk and headed for home. It was a big day. But really nothing compared to the next day, which was: super-ultrasound day (coming soon).